Intuition

 I often find myself judging others. 

I know that is looked down upon, but I can't help but be caught up in other people. 

John, a buddy of mine who I get lunch with (I know him through my friend / classmate who I have lunch with), and I were getting lunch at Panda Express, when I noticed someone I found "weird" behind me. Weird being.... I just didn't get good vibes from them. I asked John do you ever get weird vibes from random people you don't know? As in... when you look at someone, do you instantly know "oh I don't fuck with this guy"? He confirmed that he did, and asked why I brought that up. I pointed out the "weirdo" behind me, and John instantly agreed that he was "a freak", and that my intuition is right on point. 

I wonder if other people do that though, and I think that is the root of all my insecurities. I get tied up in other people. So much so, I've started to believe they notice the flaws in me too, and that this intuition of mine isn't unique to only me. That the people I interact with, or the people that see me around campus also judge me. Which... I guess is the golden rule of life "treat people the way you want to be treated". But that leads me in circles. If they're judging me, who am I to not judge them back? The bigger man? Fuck that. 

But at some point my intuition is right. 

There was this student in my digital design class last year, Creed. Right off the bat, I did not mess with his vibe (I hate using the word vibe but there is not other way to say it.... aura????). He wore a crust black shirt that had some sort of stains on it, black pants that were a tint darker than the shirt, and running shoes as everyday shoes. His hair was greasy, as if he washed it once a week, and his glasses were smudged with fingerprints. His voice had a lot of confidence for someone that smirked, and looked to his side after talking, as if to look to see who was actually listening. I'd come into class with him already sitting there, with his mechanical keyboard set up, gaming mouse at the ready, and leaning in close to whatever discord server had his attention. 

He had my attention. 

Saying that makes me sound weird. As if I had a crush on the guy. I did not. I just found him to be... a LolCow but in person. He kept posting about his OC in the class discussions. I had a thought of what if he has Devian Art of this and decided to look up the name of his OC. 

I found so much porn. 

So much porn.

Nasty stuff, stuff that I wish I never saw. Stuff I would never dream of even existing.

He also makes music which I guess is cool, but it is made for VR chat hosting stuff so........ LOL

Anyway, that's all to say my intuition seems to be pretty good.

But I still need to work on being a better person.